THE ART OF GIVING

 

Restoring faith and humanity 

Earlier this year I went to a local petrol station to get fuel. I filled up the car and went inside to pay. I had some cash but soon realised I was still $5 short. I paid for some of it anyway and told the cashier I was going back to my car to fetch more cash (I usually kept the odd gold coins for parking etc). When I returned, the response was, “Oh don’t worry about it, all is taken care of. That lady over there has paid for you!” Wait. What. What lady? Really?? I was shocked. I didn’t expect a complete stranger to do that for me! I went up to thank the lady for her random act of kindness. She told me, "It was a pleasure! I am glad I was able to put a smile on your face!”  Wow, what a feeling! I was so happy. Because it felt so good to know that someone would care enough and be so kind to another fellow human!

Have you had a similar experience? It made me think what the true meaning of giving is. A gracious offer from a stranger is a real rarity these days. We don’t expect to receive it from those who has no relation to us. That’s right! Giving is often thought as a privilege. It is a fact that giving to a stranger is a lot harderthan giving to someone that we already know. It is a lot easier to give to our family, our relatives, and our immediate circle of friends. But a total stranger? It is a challenge. Funny enough, for most part, embarrassment tends to come into the picture. “But I don’t know them. They don’t even know me. What would they think?”  Society has also taught us the mentality of ‘stranger danger’. This holds us back from interacting with people we don’t know. But if only we are brave enough to act! Never underestimate the impact of giving and what it can do to someone regardless whether we know them or not. If this resonates with you, then keep reading.

Why give? 

The most important thing about giving and receiving is the intention behind it. Simply ask "WHY AM I GIVING?”

There are 2 different types of giving:

1. Giving unconditionally without expecting anything in return.

2. Giving conditionally and expecting to receive something in return.

The first one comes from the heart. There is no strings attached. It comes with joy from the giver because the outflow of giving creates happiness.

The second one comes with the need to gain something. It is part of the concept of “What’s in it for me?”. The “Me Me Me” culture is an example. Let’s explore this further.

Human beings have a conscious and an unconscious expectations that form a barrierwhen it comes to giving. It is ingrained in our nature that we should look after ourselves first. While this is 100 percent true - “You can’t help others unless you help yourself first” - this is blurred by selfishness that is part of human nature. Most common thoughts are: “What if I don’t have enough for myself...?" or "Why should I give my hard earned money to people who are too lazy to work...?”

Realise that giving without judgement means giving without judging people’s circumstances. Our wisdom is often a good discernment, but let’s stop trying to give to only those who we think are worthy of help. Let’s see if we can change our perspective. Sometimes we just need to appreciate that we are lucky enough to able to give. Or we just need to be grateful that we are able to pay it forward. Our gifts can be so meaningful in someone else's life whether we are aware of their direct effects or not. This is why we should give 🙏

Developing habits of giving 

When was the last time you gave? If this doesn’t come naturally to you, it will take practice. For most of my life I have learnt to give freely, and stopped analysing or finding reasons as to why I need to give. Just give. Try not to think too much about it. Start small and start with one person. Anyone. There are many ways and most don’t cost anything. You can give your time, knowledge, talents, encouragement, acknowledgment, thoughts, compliments, attention, kindness, smiles, thank yous, love, and yes.. money.

The power of giving 

Giving without expecting anything in return is a beautiful thing. Giving to others is a way to pass on our blessings. Most of us have more than enough. We have way more than what we think we need. If we can afford to buy a cup of coffee everyday, we definitely have enough. If we are blessed to have full belly everyday, we definitely have enough. When we share some of our abundance, we too will feel the benefit. We too will receive more. The act of giving not only makes you a happier person, it is also good for our health. This is the power of giving.

“No one has ever become poor by giving” - Anne Frank 

Perhaps you are the type who only like to give. You find it hard to receive. It helps to understand that when you feel ‘uncomfortable’ to receive, just remember giving and receiving work together. You are making someone else happy too. It makes them happy to see you happy. Just like it makes you happy to give.

Giving is living. It’s not a privilege. It is a way of life.

Thank you for reading ❤️